UnfortunateRichard

Ya boy, Unfortunate Richard posted this review right after my review of “Land of Lewd Dream Princess Kuchipako”. I bought this hole back in December of 2020, and I am disappointed with this hole overall. Saw good things, but the good things were not for me. My excitement or the hype I had before getting this hole is what makes me have a more sour opinion on this hole.

First I want to mention that this didn’t come with lube as was advertised at the time, but with a drying stick. TD was unaware of the changes that were made to the product in Japan so I don’t blame them at all, but the drying stick just sucks. Maybe I am using it wrong, but it has never dried any hole I have put it in. It was a bad cost saving change and I am not happy with it.

When I bought this I was unaware of how firm this hole was. It is basically bouncy. It is the rubberiest hole I have ever gotten. I have never gotten a hole this firm before. I usually get holes that are as soft as the regular TOMAX material. This hole is almost bouncy. Easiest hole ever too clean tho. It takes in water like a champ and you can shoot it like a squirt gun.

I don’t like how firm the hole is, but at the same time, I finish faster with this hole than I do any other hole. Due to the firmness, you really feel what this hole has to offer with its design. The insides are nice. However, I am a very leisurely masturbater and I don’t prefer finishing as quickly as I do with this hole.

This hole also requires more force to use because of how firm it is and I also feel like it has a bit of a learning curve. I couldn’t just put it in and enjoy it. I had to kinda find a sweet spot which was annoying. Again, I am a leisurely masturbater, and this hole feels like it is saying, “You are going to jack it fast and hard and you are going to like it or suffer.”

What really kills this hole for me is that while the hole really isn't that deep, if you can’t pierce the uterus it is just a bust. If I wasn’t also fat I’d probably be able to, but as I am right now I can’t and that is a major letdown. There is also a bit of padding at the entrance which makes it all worse. This IS NOT a hole for Unfortunate Richards like myself. Look elsewhere if you can’t fill this hole up.

Ya boy, Unfortunate Richard is back at it again with another review. I bought this hole back in March of this year(2021), and I have found it to be a pretty alright hole. There honestly isn’t much to write about this one due to it being so basic, but I got a few things to say.

Now it is really, really soft. Nearly too soft. Especially fresh out of the box when it is a virgin hole. It is so soft you can’t really feel its gimmick. It is almost like you are using an untextured piece of TPE at first. However, all holes need to be broken in and there is a big difference between a new hole and an old hole. If you have ever rebought a hole due to it breaking, you probably know this. So with that said, after a month of near daily use, the hole, while still being the softest hole I have ever used, did get slightly firmer, and the texture could be felt. The broken-in version actually feels alright. And with it being so soft you can really squeeze it while using it letting you feel it even more.

Still, it is pretty basic. It is honestly the most boring hole I have ever used. This is something I’d expect to be sold to first time buyers. But what is really off putting is the look of the hole. My hole was littered with dimples and craters and it just looks damaged. I should not be able to compare the outside of a hole to the moon, but it looks damaged in the same way. There are also the weird crevices/rings/ditches that go around the hole. The Material there is very thin to the point where you can see through it sometimes. It is very concerning at first but no holes have formed there yet. Overall, the hole is ugly on the outside.

The hole is fine if you are on the smaller size as well. There isn’t much padding at the entrance, and it is the same texture all the way down. It is also really soft so you can squish it down. If you’re like me and still want to try it, go for it. It is just boring and there are better holes for fellow Unfortunate Richards.

Ya boy, Unfortunate Richard, regrets to say he didn't like this hole. I don't have much to say for this one so I'll just get right down to it. It always felt like this hole was made to resist my dick. I feel like my dick might just not be powerful enough to fight the tightness of this hole. All of my ejaculations felt like someone was trying to stop me from cuming but they failed and instead it kind of just sputtered out. I never felt 100% satisfied. I either went fully flaccid in just two seconds or my dick acted like I didn't even cum and so I used a different onahole to actually feel good.

I've had this onahole since August 2019 and I am leaving this review now because I have finally given up on trying to like it. There are good things about it for people like me. The hole is on the smaller side so that is a plus for people like me. The internals don't feel bad at all, although it is a bit on the plain side. This hole is just too tight and firm for my liking. I am a soft hole guy only. I like holes that get dominated by my unfortunate son, not holes that fight back.

Ya boy, Unfortunate Richard is back at it again with another review of a fantastic dick pleasurer. So, I got this hole back in June (2020) but I am just now leaving a review cuz I have been too busy beating my meat. Anyway, despite the box and weird design, this hole is really great if you wanted to know what it felt like to fuck a slime girl. Honestly, if HotPowers found a way to make this hole translucent with maintaining every other quality about this hole they would make a killing selling this as a slime girl hole.

First off, let's address that a real slime girl wouldn’t actually feel like this if you are actually thinking of slime. You know that green kind of snotty slime that you can find in a fake toxic barrel at the dollar store. There is no way that would actually feel that good. Same if you grabbed a jar of smuckers off the shelf and went to town. Like, if slime girls were real that is regrettably what fucking a slime girl would probably feel like. But I don’t want to fuck jelly water, I want to fuck something that feels kinda like a vagina but with a totally unnatural and soft feeling.

So I have always imagined a slime girl would have a lot of grip. A slime girl shouldn’t have any kind of “resistance” when inserting a cock into it. Your cock should slide right in and be smothered from all sides. There should be a slight pressure but your member should not feel squeezed or clamped down upon. Yet should be able to feel the inhuman contours of the slime’s insides despite the lack of a strong grip. You feel 100% of the stimulation but not much pressure. This is what my ideal slime girl pussy would feel like and I believe this hole achieves that. This may mean this hole is not for you. In fact, that could generally be considered a negative quality if it was a different hole. But the softness of this hole allows it to totally cover your cock. Like how water will conform to the shape of its vessel, this hole conforms to the shape of your dick, just like a slime should.

Even the insides feel like a slime girl’s attempt to mimic a vagina. It might sound weird, but it had this meaty quality to it like you are fucking meat. Not like an actual vagina, or an artificial vagina, but like the slime girl knows humans are made out of meat so it molded its insides to feel meaty in a totally artificial and inhuman way. What you really need to make this hole complete is a really sticky lube. Something that should feel syrupy in nature, but comes away clean. Like, it shouldn’t be sticky like sugar, but more sticky like egg whites. That would really give you the slime girl experience.

There are other slime girl properties this hole had. The hole is very soft yet holds its shape. It almost feels like the hole wants to start drooping through your fingers yet it does not. This is how I would expect a slime girl’s body to feel in your hands. A slime lopes and slithers, but a proper slime girl should be able to walk and run.

There is also the weight. This hole has a bit of heft to it that gives it the kind of dead weight I’d expect from a walking sentient 100-pound lump of jelly. Look up why it is easier to carry a person who is away vs one who is asleep. Despite mimicking a human form, I’d expect a slime girl to have that kind of dead weight that a sleeping person has. This hole has that to an extent.

Sorry if it sounds like I am hyping it up a lot. Honestly, if you have a bigger dick you may not feel this way. I am both overweight and my richard is somewhat undersized so my experience is totally not average. And another thing I want to make clear is that it doesn’t feel like you are fucking an entire slime girl, but an onahole that that was made to be like a slime girl’s vagina. I really don’t want anyone to get their hopes up and then be disappointed. If you think everything I have said so far sounds like this is a 100% must buy, maybe lower your expectations by 50%. If you are fine with the possibility of this hole only being half as good as I made it out to be then consider getting it.

Ya boy, Unfortunate Richard, went on the internet one day to buy his favorite onahole, Beautiful Girl JK Idol Kasumi. Much to my dismay, the only site that sold it no longer carries it, and they were the only seller in the US that had the rights to sell it. After being upset about that I went on a quest to find a new hole that could replace it. And this hole it is. They are around the same price and size. This one costs a few bucks more and is a few centimeters smaller, but for Unfortunate Richard that is no issue. I am not kidding when I say "A Taciturn Girl" could be the sister hole of JK Idol.

The overall sensation CAN be weak if you add too much lube but don't be an idiot and just use less lube. The size of the hole is on the smaller size as I think this is just under 5 inches, so if your Johnson is blessed by the gods you might want to stay away from this hole. I can't give you a great description of the sensation or the vacuum effect, but it really feels great to me. I fiercely unloaded my gun into this hole so hard that I could physically feel each shot's impact on the hole through the material.

I haven't had this hole for long so I am kinda worried that I am giving this hole too good of a review too soon. The reason for that is the material. One one hand, the material feels great to the touch, and it has yet to get sticky after a few washes. It hasn't even shown signs of getting sticky. On the other hand, even though the material is very soft, it kinda feels like it might crack like how hard holes do. Like, when you stretch it, pulling on both ends, you can feel the material resist in a way that almost feels like you are stretching dry skin. Maybe that is just how the material, Virgin Skin, reacts to being pulled and everything will be fine. If it lasts six months I won't complain... much, but I am worried it won't.

But for right now, everything is perfect. I don't think I could have asked for a better hole at the same price.